Start With Yourself
I’m reading a great book right now. The title is 25 Ways to Win With People by John C. Maxwell and Les Parrot, PH.D. The premise of the book is that there are tangible things that you can do to have better relationships.
The book begins by exhorting you to start with yourself. Neil Clark Warren has said “Your relationships can only be as healthy as you are.”
The Bible teaches this concept as part of the two great commandments.
Jesus said unto him, Thou shalt love the Lord thy God with all thy heart, and with all thy soul, and with all thy mind. This is the first and great commandment. And the second is like unto it, Thou shalt love thy neighbour as thyself. On these two commandments hang all the law and the prophets. Matt 22:37-41 (KJV)
Now, we all know that this can be taken to excess. There is such a thing as loving yourself too much. In fact, the natural human tendency is toward selfishness. Romans 12:3 exhorts us not to think of ourselves more highly than we ought.
On the other hand, that is not the problem with most of us. As women, we tend to be just the opposite. Many of us have been wounded by people who have injured us with words and deeds and it’s difficult to overcome those wounds.
But, it can be done.
And, it should be done.
And, the reason is this: when you value yourself, you will have more to give to others.
Isn’t that the desire of our hearts? to have more to give to those we love?
Take a few moments to think about how much you truly value yourself. Are you spending regular time with God? Do you regularly take time to recharge and refresh? Are you taking the time to learn new things? Do you regularly evaluate your life to determine the need for a course correction? Do you have people in your life who build you up rather than tear you down? Are you spending too much time listening to those voices from the past (or even the present) that are telling you that you’re no good?
This is a long list of questions and perhaps reading it does nothing but raise your stress level.
I’m not telling you that you need to do all these things today. I’m just saying that these are some of the ways to fill your cup so that you can pour out and provide for the people you love.
I would encourage you to pray about what God wants you to focus on right now.
We’re all in a different place in our lives. Some of us are already having a regular quiet time with God. Some of us may need to focus on that first. I believe that having that regular quiet time is crucial because when we have that regular time with God, He can show us what we need to do next.
Some of us have toxic people in our lives right now that we need to deal with.
Some of us need to exercise our brain and learn something new…something we’re interested in learning “just for the fun of it.” (Some of us need to exercise our bodies, LOL.)
Take a moment today to stop and think about what your greatest personal need is right now. Write it down and come up with a plan to meet that need.
If you’re stuck, I would be happy to receive your specific question and give a suggestion. E-mail me.
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Hi Tamara!
Great post and reminders here.
Have a blessed Ressurection Sunday!
Love, Cathy
April 7th, 2007 | #
Hi Tamera,
This is so foundational! The quality of our life will only be as good as the quality of our relationships. Without God, there is no hope of any changes in our relationships. With Him, all things are possible!
In Him,
Maridel
April 7th, 2007 | #
HI Tamera,
This is good info… very challenging.
Looking forward to your Ezine. I hope to have mine out by the end of the month.
Blessings,
Cindy Calvert
Come…Join the Journey to Heart Restoration
http://www.CindyCalvert.com
April 7th, 2007 | #
Hi Tamera,
Greetings from Clovis, NM where it is 30 and they have about an inch of snow! Thanks for the good word. I really needed this reminder tonight.
Blessings, Phyllis
Phyllis Sather
Proclaiming God’s Faithfulness at:
http://www.Phyllis-Sather.com
April 7th, 2007 | #